Let them be little

Let them be little

7.12.2012

36

As much as I would love love love to write amazing, positive things to report to you, I can't.  :(  Well, maybe a little.  But, this has been a miserable week.  Totally miserable.  I hate being so negative.  I do my best to find positive in most situations, but I am for real miserable.

Annabelle came down with a fever the day after the 4th.  She was happy and playful, just a fever.  Once her fever broke a couple days later, she started to get a cough and runny nose. Poor girl.  Welp, she gave whatever she had to me.  Sweet gift.  J/K.  I have not slept well since maybe Sunday night.  I actually feel like I haven't slept in 4 days.  Last night was the worst of all, where I was up for almost 4 hours.  It's hard to sleep already because of this giant belly I'm carrying around.  Then add a SUPER disgusting summer cold, and you have misery.  I can not breathe, have ZERO appetite, and feel ginormous.

Want to hear more?  My inner thighs feel numb when I walk around.  I pee what seems like every 2 minutes.  I can not get comfortable sitting, standing or laying down.  Heartburn is so bad that I can feel it in my jaw and my ears feel like they are blowing fire.  I have no appetite, and when I do, I'm scared to eat much because it will just come back up in my throat.  As much as I love feeling this little boy move, I feel like he is bruising me from the inside out.  Much like Bella's vampire baby.  ;)  My hormones make me feel like a whacko sometimes.  Like maybe I shouldn't go in public so that I don't blow up at someone and regret it.  I often have to tell people around me not to take things personally that I do or say.  I really don't feel like myself.  I have a hard time doing simple things.  For example, putting underwear on.  For real.  When I take a shower, I feel like I spent my energy for that hour and maybe the hour following.  Coffee repulses me, but I am addicted to a very small amount of caffine in the morning, so I drink it.  I cry at silly things.  And it's hard to take care of some of Annabelle's needs, and it hurts my back so bad when I pick her up.  But, I love holding her and taking care of her, so I often ignore most of the discomforts.

I could probably go on.  But, that's my life right now.  I'm not loving every minute of pregnancy like some people do.  I'm not super woman, and would never claim to be. But,  I CAN'T do things, and I do hate admitting that.  I don't remember feeling like this at all when I was pregnant with Annabelle. 

Waaaaaa waaaaa waaaa.  I'll be done complaining for now.  I'll fill out that silly questionaire.


How far along? 36 weeks!  yesssssss!
Total weight gain: around 23 lbs.
Maternity clothes? sure.  I basically wear the same skirts over and over, which are not maternity.  And the same tank tops, which are also not maternity, just long. 
Stretch marks? no.  LOVING coconut oil.  For that, and I have been putting it around my eyes before bed and in the morning.  It has helped the "I have not been sleeping" look.
Sleep: I would love to sleep.  Please, Lord, let me sleep.
Best moment this week: Hanging out with my husband, and my sweetest ever daughter.  OH, and finding out that these Braxton Hicks have not been for nothing.  I found out today that I am 1cm dilated, and about 50% effaced.  SO glad there is some progress, although i know I could walk around this way for weeks.
Miss Anything? sleep, my body, breathing through my nose.  Actually, don't get me started on what I miss.
Movement:  lots
Food cravings: no.  no food seems the best choice.  :(
Anything making you queasy or sick: food most of the time. 
Gender:  boy
Labor Signs:
contractions.  dilated, and thinning!  :)
Symptoms: tons of symptoms.  i wanna be done.
Belly Button in or out?kinda out, but not all the way
Wedding rings on or off? on
Happy or Moody most of the time: this is a terrible week to ask. 
 Looking forward to: Going to the Beth Moore conference tomorrow night with my sisters!!  I pray it is a time of refreshment and encouragement. 



So sorry for the downer post.   God continues to use Annabelle to brighten my days, and my sweet husband. ;)

1 comment:

  1. I am so sorry you're not feeling well! You have EVERY excuse to complain, darling. I hated being pregnant...even the time I WASN'T on bed rest. Bleh. It'll be over soon. You are such a good momma for giving yourself to your kiddos even now before your little boy is born! Joyful days ahead!!!

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