Let them be little

Let them be little

4.30.2014

Our BabieS.

The littlest Schmidts have been having a blast lately.  The winter was annoying as far as yucky weather and lots of sickness that just lingered in our house.  Just a couple weeks ago, Annabelle had strep, an ear infection and a weird skin thing all in one day.  Then, I woke up the next day with strep.  
Now that the weather is AWESOME and sickness seems to be gone for now, we have been busy.  We are outside every day soaking it all up! Here are some recent pics of these cuties....

Carter's best bud and cousin, Justus.

Swimming!!

I super love this picture of my little independent FOUR year old!
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BABY Schmidt #3 at 18 weeks...


Yesterday was our 'big' ultrasound.  The one that gives me major anxiety and is also so exciting at the same time.  I get so nervous for ultrasounds, but the anxiety that it brings, draws me into more conversation with Jesus.  Asking for peace and joy and a healthy baby.  We were very excited to find out if Annabelle and Carter would be getting a brother or sister.  I really did not know what to expect.  I had no strong feeling either way, and I could see PROS to either one.  We had names we liked picked out for both, too.
The ultrasound went really well.  Everything looks really good, and right on track.  That means more to me than anything.

Well, here SHE is....


Annabelle and Carter are going to have a SISTER!!  I am pretty sure we have decided on a name, but until I know FOR SURE, I am not announcing it.  I really want to decide on a name this time and call her that for the rest of the pregnancy.  This time, Craig has named her.  We were watching a movie a couple weeks ago, and at the end, he said he really liked this specific name that he had heard in the movie.  And this time, I actually liked it.  Craig comes up with silly names most of the time.  Names that no one should name their kids.  But, this time, I loved it.  We haven't talked much about the name since then.  After the doctor told us she was a girl yesterday, Craig looked at me and said, "do you know what her name is?"  I said I wasn't sure yet, and he said, " I do".  I love it that he has named his second daughter.  Love love love it.  I think this gives Craig a little extra bond with her.

How far along? 18 +Weeks
Total weight gain/loss:  around 8lbs. 
 Maternity clothes? yes yes yes.  bleh.
Stretch marks? No
Best moment this week: Finding out that our baby is healthy and that we are having another little GIRL
Miss anything: Drinking alcohol.  I have really wanted to chill on a patio with a nice margarita lately.
Movement: Yes.  Still not a ton, but I am feeling a little bit.
Food cravings: BUFFALO wings.  Cravings are so weird.  Once I get something in my mind that I want, it is ALL I can think about!  I wanted boneless buffalo wings SO bad about a week ago. Once I got them, I wanted them again and again.  The cravings I have had only last about a week, and then it is something else. 
Anything making you queasy or sick: Not really
Have you started to show yet: Yes.  everywhere.
  Gender: GIRL
Labor Signs: No.
  Belly Button in or out? in
Wedding rings on or off? On. Most likely won't come off.  Never did with other two pregnancies.
Happy or Moody most of the time: Been feeling pretty content lately.
Looking forward to: The end of school.  Only a few weeks left!


4.15.2014

FOUR

Our sweet Annabelle Grace is FOUR years old today.  As I am reminiscing about the day I gave birth to my first child, so many emotions come rushing in.  I am re-reading the first post that I wrote about her on this blog, 13 days after her birthday.  HER STORY.

 It is funny as I am reading it, how my vocabulary in terms of Down Syndrome has changed a little bit. I have read over that post a few times in the last four years, but never want to go back and change things I wrote, because it is all kind of raw as far as my emotions at the time. And, I did not have much knowledge of what DS is, and what may or may not be the 'right' vocabulary to use.  Things like "Downs child", and I said 'Downs" a lot.  Which, I have learned isn't exactly the proper thing to say I guess.  And it's not super appropriate to define a person by what they have.  Like saying "Downs child".  Rather saying, "a child with Down Syndrome".  Some get offended by those things.  I try not to, knowing that a lot of people just don't know that.  I didn't 4 years ago.  But, I kind of get it.  She is many many more things than a girl with Down Syndrome.  MANY more things define my beautiful girl.  (THIS whole subject could be an entire blog post in itself.  One I may sit down to write someday soon.)

My love for this little girl is the same, if not deeper, than it was that day in 2010.  Reading all that I wrote makes my eyes well up with tears because it brings me back to that place. My chest feels heavy remembering all that my heart felt.  It's overwhelming.  The birth of my daughter rocked and changed my world and the world of those that are in my life.  The birth of that girl rocked and changed my marriage, my relationship with my Savior, the relationships in my immediate and extended family and changed me in ways I could never ever explain.  Having a child changes you in such crazy ways anyways, but having a child with special needs does something else.  It altered my perspective on life.  God knew EXACTLY what Craig and I NEEDED.  We NEEDED Annabelle.  And we NEEDED her to have Down Syndrome.  God's gift of this little girl, this little girl with Down Syndrome, is something I will never take for granted. I would never ever change this gift.  There are certain things that were said to me after her birth that I have never forgot.  Two in particular.

1. "It's OK to grieve the life she would have had."  Someone said this to me the day after she was born.  A sweet, dear friend of mine.  I wasn't sure how to take this.  I wasn't sure if I was upset my this.  But, I have thought about it for four years, and I am finally getting it.   Never did I feel upset about who she was.  Ever.  But, I do wish, FOR HER SAKE, that things came easier to her.  I don't want her to have to struggle with things that come easy for others.  But, as a parent, it's hard to watch your child struggle at all.  You want to fix it and make things easier.  She has a hard time with some simple things, some simple milestones, and I wish those things were easier for HER. 

2. Somebody that I don't know told someone that I DO know something kind of like this, "Katie is in kind of a honeymoon stage. She's not upset about the diagnosis yet, but she probably will be."   UHHH, excuhhuuse me?    After Annabelle was born, it is true, I was in a 'honeymoon' stage.  I was loving EVERY minute of it.  Loving EVERY minute of this little girl.  Cherishing WHO she was and the amazing gift that was wrapped up so beautifully and placed in my lap.  Y'all, it's four years later, and I am still there.  No, I am not, and have never been upset about her diagnosis.  Never was I ever upset with God or did I sit and ask him "WHY?"  I never grieved about her diagnosis.  Like I said, I would love for things to be easier for her, for HER sake, but not for mine.  Craig and I were given an UNCONDITIONAL love for that sweet girl. Here is what good ol' Wikipedia has to say about unconditional love...
"Unconditional love is known as affection without any limitations. This term is sometimes associated with other terms such as true altruism, complete love, or "mother's/father's love." Each area of expertise has a certain way of describing unconditional love, but most will agree that it is that type of love which has no bounds and is unchanging."
 My love for Annabelle has NO BOUNDS, and is UNCHANGING.  

 I am so thankful for her, and for the last four years that we have had with her.  She's an incredible child, and teaches me new things ALL the time. Her joy and her love is contagious. I want to be like her when I grow up.  Ha ha.  For real though, she is just amazing.  It has been a beautiful four years.  We are looking forward to a million more.









































4.07.2014

My Little Family








Last weekend, we were able to get some family pictures taken, and we are so happy how they turned out.  I am pretty confident that I have the two cutest kids of all time.


ANYWAYS, besides all that cuteness, I wanted to update about the pregnancy a bit.  Pretty uneventful, which I am thankful for.  The queesy tummy and aversions to all smells is pretty much gone.  Exhaustion is the worst part right now. I get SOOOOO tired.  We had our first little ultrasound on March 20, and everything looks good so far.  
How far along? 15 +Weeks
Total weight gain/loss: 5 lbs.
 Maternity clothes? Pants, yes. I was getting ready for MOPS the other day, and wanted to wear a cute outfit.  I almost decided to just not go because NONE of my regular pants would fit.  Even the belly band wasn't helping.  My body changed pretty quickly already.  Looks like it's maternity pants and skirts from here until the end.  
Stretch marks? No
Best moment this week: Discussing name ideas with Craig.  He makes me laugh every time we talk about names because he comes up with the most outrageous names.  I mean, names that no one would name their child.  Mostly because he can't think of anything.  He came up with a sweet girl name the other day, though. ;)
Miss anything: More energy.  And I still miss running.  The 10 mile race that I had signed up for before being surprised by this pregnancy is coming up this weekend.  I am not running it, and it bums me out a whole lot.
Movement: I'm not sure if the little bit that I have felt is baby or if it's just gas.
Food cravings: YES!  A week ago I was craving strawberries SO bad.  I got a little belly ache from eating them. And I also craved the lime tostito chips.  Actually, I went through a carton of strawberries in two days and a bag of chips in about 2 or 3 days.  Yikes.  
Anything making you queasy or sick: Not really
Have you started to show yet: Yes.  everywhere.
  Gender: No idea.  We find out April 29.  
Labor Signs: No.
  Belly Button in or out? in
Wedding rings on or off? On. Most likely won't come off.  Never did with other two pregnancies.
Happy or Moody most of the time: Both. 
Looking forward to: Seeing some friends at the end of this week.